Pigs in Buckets
by illmtl
Summary: This was just for fun, when I was bored pls R/R, if u want I can probably write more. Very much an abstract ff


I do not own LOTR well actually I do but not in that sense.

  
  
Middle-Earth; Yeah Right! 

"Gillian why don't we go to Middle-Earth and visit people like Legolas, mmmmmmmmmmmm, wouldn't that be fun," I said to Gillian one Saturday, "I've figured it out see, I've done all the calculations, Rebecca was right all along, all you really have to do is put a pig in a bucket."

"Yes," says Gillian giving me one of her looks which say 'This time I know you're lying'. I turned away down hearted, if Gillian didn't believe me who would....... Sara might. And Yes, Sara did. First problem was finding the pig. We had no idea where we could get one so we turned to EBAY and managed to get a pig for only $20, so that was good but then we needed a bucket large enough to fit it, this we put off we went to see if anyone wanted to come with us. We asked Sam and Laura, who thought we were both mad, and we asked Rebecca who agreed, "Anything for a weird life". We didn't even bother asking Rachael, we didn't want her to come it would spoil everything, besides we wanted Legolas and Frodo for ourselves, mmmmmmmmmmmmm. Anyway next day we found for ourselves a bucket big enough to fit our pig and prepared ourselves for the journey. We agreed on a specific place in Middle-Earth to focus on so we ended up in the same place. We decided on thinking of just outside Rivendell. We concentrated hard on this place and put the pig in the bucket.

BANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A huge explosion tore the air and we fell onto soft grass. When we came round we noticed changes in ourselves, like we were of the race of the person we fancied, so basically I was taller Sara was shorter and, well, Rebecca was basically the same, only with a smaller nose. Our clothes were also different, we were wearing the clothes of our new race, so obviously I was the prettiest of us all, He he he! We picked ourselves up and found that we had three horses grazing nearby with full packs. We decided, what the Hell, lets take them. We decided to stalk our respective crushes so with something guiding our hearts we went of on our different roads to find our loves.

I had left the others a week ago and I was most of the way over the high pass which would take me over the misty mountains. We had agreed to meet back in Rivendell when our respective persons arrived. Mine was a fairly easy journey as I was an elf, because elves don't feel hot or cold, He he he! Eventually I reached the Great river and crossed, from there I headed north till I reached the entrance to the elf-path. Then I journeyed all the way to Thranduil's halls. There I met Legolas, you know he really is far more beautiful than in the movie, words do not begin to describe, anyway I met him and that was great. When he left for Rivendell I made him let me come too and so it was that when we once made camp for the night he kissed me. The most wonderful feeling, you just can't imagine, well anyway I fainted. And Legolas DID NOT CATCH ME, I was quite put out when, after discovering a great lump at the back of my head inquired upon how I got it, he told me how. During the time that I had been unconscious we had travelled a lot further. In time we came again to the high pass and then to Rivendell. Even after we reached Rivendell I still had not forgiven him for not catching me, and he was eager to regain my approval so I let him. Once I found Sara and Rebecca I found that they had not been as successful as I so I went and forgave Legolas just so I could boast that he had kissed me twice, this time when he kissed me he caught me as I fainted and so my life was complete. The next day we decided that we should go home, all we had to do was get a pig and a bucket, which wasn't that simple. Well actually we got the pig easily but we had to get the elves to make a bucket large enough, but they did do it. Once we had our pig and bucket we set ourselves up concentrated on home and put the pig in the bucket.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!GNAB

A huge implosion fixed the air and we rose onto hard concrete. We were home. Only one thing had gone wrong, we hadn't changed back so I was still an elf, but that wasn't the best bit neither was the fact that Sara was now waist tall but we still had the clothes, which are, for lack of a better word, cool. The next day we went and saw our friend who had mocked us and proved them wrong and we never told Rachael about it so she wouldn't try. And life went on and I watched all my friends age and die and, in the end, went back to Middle Earth to live with Legolas, mmmmmmmm. Hehehe Rachael couldn't come.


End file.
